Showing posts with label sensory issues. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sensory issues. Show all posts

Friday, November 11, 2011

The Dreaded Appointment


(Re: July 2011)

Pediatric dentists want to see babies when the first tooth appears, but the first visit is not  to be completed by the first birthday. They will make sure everything is developing properly and quiz the parents about whether the child is put to bed with his bottle. It also begins to establish a familiarity with the process. Most people, including my dentist, recommend taking a child to the dentist for the first time around age three, because by then he has all of his teeth.

I scheduled an appointment for Liam shortly after his third birthday. We didn’t go. Liam had been sick and was a crank, and I didn’t think that would be the greatest timing. I scheduled another appointment shortly after Liam’s fourth birthday. I had to cancel that one because it was the same day as his early intervention evaluation. Then I was just plain terrified. I was certain that Liam would melt down at the dentist. All of the smells, sounds, lights, tools, and hygienists talking in their best “kid voices” who mean well, but in would freak out my kid in their attempts at being “fun”.

Liam’s fifth birthday went by, and six months of ABA therapy went by. We’ve all learned a lot about sensory inputs and how Liam responds. We’ve had some success desensitizing him in some cases. Fro instance, I can cut his hair in one sitting instead of three. He still doesn’t like it, but he lets me get the job done. I still don’t think I could take him somewhere, but probably wouldn’t anyway!

No five year old should go without a visit to the dentist, especially one whose mother has HORRIBLE teeth. I located a dentist who has experience with autism, and more important, will tailor their approach to make every kid comfortable. I filled out all of the paperwork and told all of Liam’s secrets. I scheduled another appointment – this one we were keeping. No matter what.

I started preparing.

I bought books to read to Liam. We talked about going to the dentist and what would happen. We Googled pictures of people at the dentist so he wouldn’t expect everything to be exactly like Dora’s or Spongebob’s accounts. We practiced opening wide and counting his teeth. We talked about the big chair that moves, the light, the sink, the tools, the sounds, and the new toothbrush at the end. A month later, Liam was excited. We were as ready as possible.

When the long anticipated day finally arrived, we went in and were greeted by a welcoming décor – part tiki hut, part tropical rainforest. We waited only a few minutes and were called back. They led us to a private exam room. Liam explored everything. He pointed to things and told us what everything was and what it was for. The hygienist smiled at me and said, “You’ve been getting ready for this for a while, yes?” Yes. You have no idea. Yes.

Once Liam had adequately checked everything out, the hygienist asked him to climb into the chair. He hopped right up. She moved Liam up and down a few times, then leaned him back. She turned the light on and of and gently angled it so as not to shine it in his eyes. She let him taste the toothpaste and see the spinning toothbrush. She turned on the toothbrush and touched it. He touched it. She didn’t think it was weird that he rubbed his cheek on it. Then she began. She was perfect. She let him call all of the shots, stopping when he needed a break, giggling at how his tongue kept getting in the way. The dentist came in and was equally perfect with Liam.

I was impressed at the ability of the entire staff to be so accommodating, I was certain that this would be a horrible experience and was ready for the daddy of all meltdowns. I was SO relieved that this went so well.

And Liam. LIAM. He was so awesome. I learned that with enough of the right preparation, we can get through anything. 





Wednesday, April 13, 2011

A True Testament

Tonight there was a fundraiser for Liam's center at Monkey Joe's.  This is exactly the sort of place I would have NEVER attempted to take my sweet boy a year ago - or even six months ago!  Tons of loud kids all running around like maniacs and drinking caffeine and eating pizza.  Not to mention the climbing, jumping, sliding, bouncing, and other assorted mayhem.

But we went.  For an hour.

Liam LOVED it.  He would have stayed all night.  I loved it too because he wasn't as bothered by the chaos and noise as I expected him to be.  Granted, its a big place and it was a weeknight, so I imagine it gets way worse...but still.  He was amazing.

I was talking to one of the therapists who was there.  She made a very casual comment about how much fun Liam was having.  I fought back tears as I told her what a testament to the center's work in his little life this night was.

In our house, we celebrate the small victories.
Keep climbing Liam!!

Saturday, April 9, 2011

A Moment of Honesty

(Written Spring 2010)

Sometimes I’m resentful.  There.  I said it.  Well kind of if writing counts, which I think it does.  We’ve never been quite able to do things other families do. 

We had a recent train wreck while attempting to go to church.  I took him to Sunday school.  I thought he would be fine since his favorite person in the world – Kara, AKA KK, was there too.  So Josh and I are sitting in the sanctuary and  hear this loud kid.  I look at Josh,  “Was that Liam?” I whisper.  “Nah,” he says.  Then, “Yeah, maybe.”  So I go look.  Sure enough, there he was in the classroom of 20 or so kids, all the rest sitting in chairs around some tables, he is just standing there yelling.  Not mad or upset, but seemingly unable to be a regular kid like the others.  The “teacher” who was doing a wonderful thing giving her time to the children and thus serving her God, had no idea what to do with him.  So I stayed and sat with him, he kept it together after that. 

We tried again another Sunday, and that was equally disastrous except worse because when we tried to leave – before the service was over – we were parked in.  I cried all the way to Noodles where Josh was taking us for lunch to try to salvage the day.  I feel like I need to be going to church.  But now we can’t because Liam can’t handle it. 

So there.  I said sometimes I feel resentment.  But then I look at this precious boy and I get over it.   

That Call from School

(Re: Late Winter / Early Spring 2010)

In the interest of socialization, structure, and draining the checkbook, we enrolled Liam in preschool.  They will get him caught up for sure.  He will see the other kids eating with their forks and peeing in the potty and he’ll want to do it too.  About six months in, he was in the four year old class.  I got a call from school asking to set up a meeting with us.  I asked what about.  The director proceeded to tell me that Liam is performing below a three year old level and that they thing he needs more help than they are able to give him.  Uh oh.  This isn’t going away.  He’s not catching up.  They suggested we find out who in the school system can do an early intervention evaluation.  Of course they didn’t know who that might be since we live in a different school district.  Luckily, I had a friend who knew who I should contact. Thank God for her.  I’d still be trying to figure out who to call.  So I called this “parent contact” lady.  She asked lots of questions about Liam and mailed a mountain of paperwork to fill out.  Phew.  Made it though without my hand breaking off.  His evaluation – two 2 ½ hour days of “preschool” where several experts in different fields analyze my boy – was scheduled.  This presented what I’m guessing is the first of many logistical challenges.  Josh dropped him off and I picked him up and delivered him to his actual preschool 20 miles away.  The first day when I got there to rescue him from all of the mean people….I mean to pick him up and make the transfer….the psychologist asked if I had a minute. Shit. Not really, its 11:30, Liam has to be at school by 11:45 for lunch, and I have to get back to work. But for this – of course I have a minute. For Liam I have the rest of my life.  Then, she became the second person to mention the A word in connection with my perfect boy.  Have I considered it?  Sure.  But you are a professional and if you are considering it…GULP…this is not happening…PLEASE NO this CAN’T BE HAPPENING.  The next couple of days were difficult.  We decided to attempt to figure out what is going on privately as well and started that process.  (Another mountain of paperwork).  Now we wait.